Having had the pleasure of witnessing a supposedly well-to-do woman carrying a small scrap of a dog in her handbag (something I had always believed to be a myth dreamt up by TV producers and publicists) I have finally come to the conclusion that it is in fact not me that is mad, it genuinely is everybody else.
After idly wondering about the technicalities of the animals excreta, I was advised by my companion that "they wear a nappy". So we have evolved the the point as a species where an indication of social status is having an animal with legs, carried around in a bag and gently infusing the finest Italian leather with a subtle hint of canine caca.
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